Winners And Losers
Some people, and I think this is primarily a man thing, are so competitive they stay the course even when it makes no sense to do so. Some men get the blues over something as ridicules as a sporting event, when their team loses. It is never about “how you play the game” or losing with dignity. It is always about winning.
Of course winning is essential to success in the major endeavors we encounter in life. As I have said so many times before, it is all a matter of balance and priority. A platitude worth remembering is, pick your battles. In the words of Dale Carnegie:
“Any fool can criticize, complain, condemn – and most fools do. Picking your battles is impressive and fighting them fairly is essential.”
Fight for your life, fight for what you know to be right, not a football game or bravado to prove you have the biggest dick.
We equate winners with never giving up. How often I have seen men hell-bent of finishing something, wasting a part of their life finishing what they started, when in reality it will do nothing to enhance their life, or the lives of others. You do not have to finish a book, a movie, or yes guys, even a competition if you don’t enjoy it. You don’t have to finish your term on a board, a committee, or similar obligations unless it is the right thing to do. There is a major difference between quitting a thing after careful thought and inspection, or quitting without consideration or simply because you find it hard to do.
In his 1977 bestseller, “Looking Out For # 1” Robert Ringer says in regards to winning,
“Winning merely for the sake of winning elevates it to an end in itself and thereby relegates the main objective – happiness – to a position of lesser importance.”
Under the assumption that we all want to be happy, that becomes the goal of life. It follows that even if you are willing to put forth all the time and effort possible, you are not going to win at everything anyway. Your team will sometimes lose.
Consider the man who plays golf to relax and have fun. See him red-faced angry, hurling his clubs down the fairway, cursing the God who made him, because he is having a bad golf day. He not only ruins the day for himself, there is a good chance he will have a problem finding someone to play with for another outing. This is the world of little men, who in fact know nothing but winning or losing.
